Heavy risk, but the priiiiize
by RandomCookieChick
Summary: Aoife Shepard is calmly practicing her target practice. It seems that something always has to go topside up right?  Fem!Shep/Thane, some Miranda/Jacob hints too.


**Here we go again, and goooood news! I've finally found a name for my Shepard. **

**May I introduce you to Aoife Shepard! "Aiofe" is a gaelic name, taken from a warrior princess and meaning "beauty". Lots and lots of thanks to Matyrfae for giving me the idea of using a gaelic name. They're such pretty names and I think this suits Shepard to a T. I'm sure Thane thinks so ^_^**

**Anyways, bit by bit I'm grabbing ideas for my main story, which I am hoping to post the first chapter up in a few weeks, maybe less... . Oh heck I'm rambling, enjoy!**

Bang.

Aiofe reloaded her rifle, her steely gaze fixed on the holo-targets.

"Well done Commander" The AI's voice blipped through her concentration. "That was a 96.86576% chance that it would have had a direct and fatal hit. May I offer some advice?"

"yeah, shoot EDI, wait wait! Not literally!" Shepard chuckled, knowing that the poor AI didn't seem to possess the attributes of sarcasm. "I mean, just give me the advice" she looked at the ceiling. It was a common habit for most of the crew. Even though they knew where she was built into the ship was below them, they still looked up as if she was some kind of spirit, or even a "Holy voice of the heavens" as Joker (Whilst drunk) had declared one foggy night in Omega.

"You may want to aim precisely 0.257 inches higher than your current aim. This would puncture the centre of the heart, triggering a major and fatal heart attack which would cause the body to suffer a spasm of fits lasting 1.2864 seconds before it would collapse and die. Another way is to fire precisely-"

"Ok ok EDI!, thanks for the..information" Aoife quickly relented, placing her rifle back onto it's stand on the wall.

"Very well Shepard, is there anything else?"

"That...will be all" she answered smartly.

"Logging out out commander" and with a blip, she was gone. "Nice work there Shepard" Jacob's voice breached her thoughts. "O-oh. Jacob, didn't see you there" she replied, brushing the ever wavy fringe out of her eyes. "Nah, I was...discussing some tactics for missions with Miranda".

At this Shepard had to bite her lip tightly to stop from roaring with laughter. Only a few nights ago she, Miranda, Kelly, Tali, Chakwas and Jack had gone to have a ladies night. Or, as Jack put it. "Lets get pissed!"

During this night she'd had a discussion with Miranda about well..their events with their lovers, Thane and Jacob. Usually neither Jacob or Miranda would talk about their relationship, strictly denying anything, but it was a small ship. You could never hide anything for long. Miranda, whilst extremely drunk had commented on the first thing Jacob had said to her on their first night together. "What's this...sneaking into miss lawson's office...heavy risk..but the priiiize" . Shepard had never laughed so hard in her life, Miranda doing a perfect impression with moose lips and all.

Clearing her throat and steering herself from thoughts which would easily gain her crewmate's dissaproval, she nodded, putting on her commander face. "I should go, I'll see you round Jacob"

"Commander"

"Oh wait, Jacob?"

"Yes Shepard?"

She bit her lip. Could she, will she...

Dare she?

Oh go on.

"Heavy risk...but the priiize eh Jacob?"

And with that she sprinted quickly out of the door into the elevator, her finger pressing multiple times into the button before it opened, deaf to Jacob's shouts behind her.

She could barely contain her laughter when she arrived in her cabin, not at all surprised to see Thane lounging on the couch, a datapad in hand. Throwing herself next to him the floodgates opened and she roared with laughter, tears rolling down her face as she clutched Thane's jacket tightly, burying her head into his shoulder, her own shoulders shaking with laughter.

Thane, the ever nimble assassin, never bothered by anything at all, casually turned his head towards his lover, raising a small brow at Aiofe, a small smile creeping onto his face.

It was moments like this that he truly cherished being with her, being with his _Siha_.

In her moment of absolute weakness, her defences all wide open...

Why stop her laughing?

With a smirk he attacked his lover, his fingers mercilessly tickling her sides. With a squeal she tried to push away from him, laughter pealing out from her lungs.

After a long and hard 10 minutes, he let her collapse on the sofa, gasping for air as a permanent smile stretched itself across the sofa. With a small smile he gathered her in his arms and cuddled her close, kissing her hair.

"So what exactly were you laughing at earlier _Siha _?"

Aiofe could only smile and snuggle her head into Thane's neck as she murmured the words;

"But the priiiize"

**And thats it XD**

**I've lost the amount of times I've seen someone make the "Heavy risk" joke by Jacob. Bless him, at least he's good for something :P**

**I hope you enjoyed, please rate and review! **

**-Random**


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